Some people ignore all the signs and intuitions before they say “I Do” and end up in a miserable state of marriage. Love can cause you to look past a persons flaws, but there are flaws and behaviors that one should pay very close attention to as well. Each person has to decide for them selves what their deal breakers are; and might I add that your deal breakers should not be everything and keep you from ever becoming one with someone. Standards are important, so when it’s time to go, you know when that is, don’t fool yourself. Breaking up on good terms is not always an option, but I’ve come up with some ways to get it done. It seems like it’s the hardest thing to do when things are going well, but you’ll be doing you both a favor when you break things off and pay attention to that voice whispering “nooo.” Also, there is this myth going around that the proper way to break it off with someone is a face to face conversation. But that’s not always true or possible. Here is a list of 5 Ways to Break-Up.
1) Meet them at a park, sit down on the bench and break it down to them gently.
When you arrive separately this allows you to leave as soon as you are done and no one has to ride together after a deep uncomfortable conversation. Also, the beauty of the surroundings may help to visually stimulate a broken heart. (Maybe not while it’s snowing !)
2) Leave them a long voice mail.
This may sound impersonal, but if you feel the person will try to reel you back in and you may not be able to break free, this may be a safer way to cut things off. You can even explain that in the message.
3) Write them a poem, and hand it to them at a time when you know you’ll just be passing by, (work or church).
The poem is to show that you are not mad or hurt and that you appreciate them as a friend. Sometimes things just don’t work out, but that doesn’t mean it’s because the person is a horrible person. I may be sad about the break-up but the poem would help me receive a devastating message for sure.
4) Send them a thank you card expressing you’re grateful for the time you had, but you need to move on.
Yes they really do make these kinds of cards.
5) Write a nice long letter explaining why you are walking away from the relationship and wish them the best in life.
Letters are sometimes more powerful than a face to face conversation which can get ugly. Letters have always been my favorite way to communicate on a difficult topic, and it is very personable.