1 lovemoneySo I was listening to a lesson from a Dr.  and he was saying that the intensity that you have chasing your goals, dreams, and business, has to decrease a lot after marriage and if it doesn’t your marriage will fail. He also said that he didn’t date for years until he got his PHD, after he was given that advice that he would be better off pursuing that dream without the distractions. And that was what he though he needed to do and did it. He went on in his lesson and it was almost as if he was saying get everything that you want to accomplish that requires a lot of attention done and over with before you marry, because when you do marry, that stuff has got to slowwwwww downnnnn. Now, do I believe your marriage should come first, yes I do! But here is what else I believe about what he had to say.

Personally, I was not able to chase my dreams the way that I have since I’ve been married. The freedom and support has made all the difference. My husband actually pushed me to chase my dreams down. He has supported me mentally, emotional, and financially. I really believe when the speaker said that “the intensity will decrease and if it doesn’t your marriage will fail” isn’t necessarily true in everyone’s case, because every person and couple is different. So to each person and each marriage they have to see what works. Should our marriages come 1st, oh yes it should, and the bible says that your spouse should come before your children. Yet, you don’t love them less or give less intensity of to those relationships. It’s just a proper order. Lastly, my husband can testify that I have been able to help him with his vision and dreams to start his own business. WE BOTH have chased this thing down and he would not have had it any other way. When he needs to spend time building I understand that and when I didn’t it was because I wasn’t living out my own calling and pursuing my own dreams. There have been seasons when our marriage suffered from us being too busy with other things, but that’s because we are human. Due to our relationship with God, we always get back on track, staying together, and going hard for what we want together and individually.

So my point here as I close is that you must know yourself. For some you may need to wait, but make sure it’s GOD leading you to wait and not you own selfish flesh. Who are we to turn away a blessing that God sends our way to make our path run smoother? My hubby says he couldn’t have done it without me and I know he was sent to me by God to help me with all that I’ve accomplished.

Will your dreams suffer because of marriage? You decide.

Will your marriage suffer because of your dreams? You decide.

Who says you can’t have both?


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