At one point in my life I needed a lot of people around me most of the time when I felt uncomfortable or sad. When I was alone, in my own presence, it made me feel unhappy. I mean who likes hanging out with someone they don’t like? Once I began to appreciate, value, and truly love myself, being with me and only me wasn’t bad at all. I even learned how to make myself laugh, a lot.
There are people who will try to cause you to fill bad or guilty because you are not there for them. Maybe you were busy and you could not talk to them on the phone for hours, maybe they needed you for a favor and you were not available or are never available. Sometimes people can make their issues look like they are in fact someone else’s problem, you should know this isn’t so.
When I hated being alone with myself, I charged others with the responsibility of bringing the joy, fun, and laughter into my world. Even my husband was in charge of me having a good life. That is so unfair. If there is anyone in your life at this point that has given you the burden of responsibility to bring them joy and happiness, I want you to make it clear to them that it’s not your responsibility. Only God can give joy, the joy that we seek out anyway. I’m not saying that having a child and holding them near as you embrace their newborn smell isn’t a joyful thing, but even God is the giver of that child, He is the source of all joy.
Whether you have to make it clear that you are not in God’s position to cause someone’s life to be joyful by making a statement, writing them a letter, or actually removing yourself from the relationship for good or a period of time, it has to be done. This is not only best for you but this is how you show them love in a healthy way.
Have you ever been in a relationship with someone who depended on you for their happiness?